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BLOG - ER Ramachandran

Monday, July 10, 2006

Rajyostava Awards -2006

Take it easy!

Rajyothsava Night - 2006

The Chief Secretary called the meeting of Secretaries to order.

Keeping in mind the stringent criticism of Dharam Singh Government last year on Rajyostsava awards as catering to only the glitterati, HDK had asked the Chief Secretary to broad base the Rajyothsava Award 2006 to include as many to coincide with the 51st year of formation of Karnataka. The instruction from the Chief Secretary to his colleagues was loud and clear. “Be innovative. Let’s hit ‘51’ everywhere. Go get ‘em”!

The Transport Secretary got up to start.

‘ My Minister told me to include all vehicle owners whose Registration Numbers end with ‘51’ for Rajyothsava 2006 Awards. Here’s the list of Scooter, Moped, Motorcycle, Tempo, Taxi, Maxicab, Auto rickshaw, Tonga, Wheel cart, Car and Lorry owners who fall in the category. The number comes to over 5000 from our side. Of course we will update this list as we go along till the Awards Night.’

‘Good. What have you got for us?’ The CS asked the Education Secretary.

‘ Azim Premji is personally helping us. All students from creche to degree class whose ID No. end with ‘51’ have been rounded up. I have also included students whose bus passes end with ‘51’ into the list. It’s quite possible it should come under the Transport Ministry. If I take it into my list, I’ve 15000 Awardees lined up for the big night.’

‘ Let’s not quibble over such trivia. We need numbers real fast. Understand!’

‘ I have included Ration card holders, Bank and Post Office Account holders, Senior citizens Accounts, Retired Defense personnel etc. All People with Accounts ending with ‘51’ will be there on November 1st to receive the Awards. I am able to mop up another 15000 so far’. That was the Finance Secretary.

‘Fine. We need to get the Common man into this .I will take the help of Sudha Murthy! I will visit hospitals and prisons around the State myself and get another 20,000 who will reach ‘51’ years by November 2006.I will attend C.M.s’ Janata Darshan from now on and try and get another 15000. How much does it all add up to?’ the Chief Secretary asked.

‘Sir, the Awardees will be over 51000+. Where can we find a place for all of them?’

‘ I will talk to Brijesh Patel and get Chinnaswamy Cricket stadium for a night. We can squeeze all the Awardees in the Stands. Since the public who come to watch such functions will be just a handful, we can put them with the dignitaries on the pitch along with the Governor, C.M. and the Cabinet Ministers.’

One of the Secretaries asked, ‘Sir, There will be a question. What is the contribution of the Awardees to Karnataka?’

Just tell ‘They and their families have endured last 51 years of rule’.

‘ Sir, one last question. Where should we sit?’ asked one of the Secretaries.

‘ Don’t be silly! There won’t be enough space. We will have to watch it on T.V. in the pavilion. I will get ‘Chandana’ to cover it live!’

E.R. Ramachandran 11 July 2006


  • Mr GVK,

    1)Replace the following:

    MERA MYSORE MAHAAN that appears in your home page by a Kannada verson.

    2) Allow free discussions without 'modration' (or censoring) as we are trying to show what a phony your blogger the self-styled 'Captain' Mr Muthy.
    3) You say we including Kris slander this phony 'Captain' Murthy.
    You also salander Manasagangothri as
    'PG Koppal'. This is an incitement by a bunch of superannuated brahmins. Your friends want to go back to time when the university was packed with one single class (almost, minorities were on scrap heap and women were confined to smokey kitchens. Girls could not go to university, untouchability rampant etc..

    4) finally back to Mr Murthy again. Our research unearthed intersting findings, including his college day activities - how he 'bunked 'classes was wandering around women's colleges thumbing noses to many. One retired sub-inspector says that he was about to arrest Mr Murthy for loitering, but he promised not to be back near that women's college again. He was let out, but he was back near another women's college! His parents had enough of him, packed with cash and with a relative's help sent him America for study. This fellow was lying for a time saying that he was indeed studying in an university. Well, well well!

    Publish the above please, if you dare and see how many responses you will get. Some may be even from those girls he was teasing

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 3:24 AM  

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